Do you feel like you have difficulty controlling your child? Are you concerned about your child’s behaviour, social or emotional adjustment and/or general development?
Having a “problem” child places a great strain on the parent-child relationship. At times like that, I have often heard parents say, “I love my child, but I don’t like him/her.
It is difficult to enjoy being a parent when you have a child who is defiant, argumentative or aggressive. A negative cycle develops where the child’s behaviour leads to parental rejection, and the child’s feeling of being rejected and unloved leads to more negative and defiant behaviour.
Talking through the issues will allow us to identify what's happening in your child's world that may explain their behaviour; This, in turn, will provide you with some understanding of what is going on between you, and we can then find strategies for both reducing the challenging behaviour and improving the parent-child relationship.
One of the most important factors is for both parents to collaborate and decide on the actions to reward, and those that will result in consequences. Missing this step means your child will experience inconsistent expectations between parents, which your child may exploit and will lead to a stressed relationship between you and your partner.
I also encourage 'democratic parenting' by holding frank and open discussion amongst the whole family regarding “Family Rules”. Being clear about expectations and allowing your child to take a role in deciding what is not admissible and what the consequences may be, empowers them to take responsibility for their actions.
As we say, “children do not come with an Instruction Manual” With the many years I have had working with children and parents, I may be able to help with many of the problems parents face in raising children, and many of the problems children face in growing up in this increasingly complex and ever-changing world.
I welcome you to make an appointment to improve the harmony in your household and improve your relationship with your child, your child's behaviour and emotional life.